


His Beacon

by thoughshebebbutlitle



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Season 5B speculation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-27
Updated: 2015-11-27
Packaged: 2018-05-03 16:19:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5298002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thoughshebebbutlitle/pseuds/thoughshebebbutlitle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He does not want to be haunted by her, not while he is here alone; he does not want any slither of hope, for it would be too painful for him to bear when she does not come for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	His Beacon

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little one shot on Killian in the underworld. I’ve got another fic on the way as well, I’m on a bit of a roll if I do say so myself :)

He has been fighting for so long and he is tired. He cannot sleep, not in this damp, dark cell. It does not help that he sees her every time he closes his eyes. Her image is tattooed on his eyelids; he cannot escape even the memory of her in this damned place. He does not want to be haunted by her, not while he is here alone; he does not want any slither of hope, for it would be too painful for him to bear when she does not come for him.

He knows she will try; she will fight until it almost destroys her. But she will not succeed. She will fail and her family will pick up the broken pieces and fix her as best they can. She might even find someone new to spend the rest of her life with. He finds a part of him wants her to have used up all her chances for love, yet he prays that she will not replace him, not forget him. He cannot do anything either way for he is trapped here, doomed to be alone and powerless for eternity.

The shadows play with him. They crawl closer until he is surrounded and trapped in the corner of his prison and then it climbs. It tugs on his clothes as it scales his body, up into his mind and tortures him. Of course they use her image. She appears like an angel before him, healing his wounds and whispering soothing comforts as she whisks him away from this horrid place. Sometimes the visions merely fade and the horror is the return to the lonely cell. But often, when the darkness is feeling particularly cruel, she turns on him. Her smiles twist into cruel snarls that tear him apart. She taunts him with words denouncing her love for him, she calls him ‘nothing’, she tells him she is glad that he is gone. He tries to ignore her, he knows what she says is not true, but she pierces his heart with every sound she makes until he can no longer bear it and falls to the ground begging for mercy. He does not know how he will endure this until the end of time.

She comes again as she always does; he hears her frantically calling his name as she has done many times before. He is so tired that he does not move from the corner he has propped himself against when she breaks through his cell door with a kick. There is a voice in his head that tells him that her ghost has never worn a red leather jacket before but it is drowned out by the many other voices screaming in fear of what they know is about to come. He closes his eyes and wills himself to disappear into the shadows, waiting for her to strike. But she doesn't; she calls his name gently and strokes his hair. The demons haven't used this tactic in a long time but he still does not trust the kindness. He covers his ears to drown out the words that can only end in pain and shakes his head in denial of what has been his reality for so long.

He realises something is different when her family enter through the door as well. They have never featured in his nightmares before, it is always just Swan, and it catches him off guard. It is only when Regina warns Emma that they need to leave before they are discovered that any hope manages to find a grasp on his heart and he looks up at her. As soon as their eyes connect he knows this is no vision, she is really here to save him. There is so much life in her gaze that he panics. His chest heaves as he finds a reason to be happy after all this pain; her smile matches his as their eyes start to fill with tears. Then her mouth is on his, he had forgotten what she tasted like, of the ocean and of fresh air. He sobs into her embrace as she too cries with relief and reunion. There is now a chance of their broken hearts healing again.

He is hardly aware of their journey out of the underworld, his eyes are fixed on her golden hair leading the way as David and Robin half carry him towards the light of day. She is the beacon he dared not hope for, the beacon he swears to follow for the rest of his days. He decides in that moment that he would live through hell all over again if she needed him to, for she is his purpose and his heart has been hers since that day on the beanstalk.


End file.
